He Becomes a She, and Still the Marriage Endures
Jeff Wright
The Register-Guard, Oregon
_________________
Eugene, Or. (United States):
Russell and Marsha Taylor met at a party, fell in love, got married, had two children, grew a business and bought a big white house on a hill.
But then a funny thing happened on the way to living happily ever after: Russell became Rebecca.
Diagnosed with gender identity disorder, Rebecca Taylor last year flew to Thailand to see a doctor she regards as the best in the world for sexual reassignment surgeries. Taylor describes the day of the surgery, Feb. 12, 2004, as "my second birthday."
The difference between who she is now and who she was then, she says, "is the difference between being real and playing a role." In her view, gender identity disorder is no different than, say, having a cleft palate: "It's a medical condition that needs to be fixed."
The surgery culminated a two-year process in which Taylor presented herself in public as a woman, started therapist-approved hormone therapy and took the necessary steps to acquire a new driver's license identifying her as legally female.
In her former life, Taylor was an Oakridge kid who played clarinet in the school band and guard on the school football team. A self-described computer nerd, Taylor joined the family's successful electronics business and served a stint on the Oakridge City Council.
Today, Taylor lives and works in Eugene, where her business, Diamond Edge Technology, provides a six-figure income for her and her family.
She also finds herself at political odds with other transgendered residents in town because, as a woman, she says she opposes allowing people who are not legally defined as female from entering women's public showers and locker rooms.
But mostly, Taylor, 38, defines herself as a homebody who dotes on her partner and children - and acts surprised when others are surprised that her marriage and family are intact.
"We are a great couple - far better now than when I was pretending to be who I was not," she says of her spousal relationship. "We are soulmates. The idea of us not being together is ludicrous."
She and the former Marsha Jones met at a party in Oakridge, where both grew up, and married in 1992. Daughter Megan, whose facial features resemble Rebecca's, arrived in 1997, and 5-year-old Ryan was born the same year the family moved to Eugene.
Marsha Taylor, 34, does some accounting work for Rebecca's business but is mostly a stay-at-home mom. Marsha sees little mystery in how she managed to modify yet maintain their relationship.
"I love her," says Marsha, who is bisexual. "It doesn't matter to me what genitalia she has. It's her soul, her spirit, her kindness. Overriding all that is our relationship and her parenting skills."
Oct 15, 2005
Jeff Wright
The Register-Guard, Oregon
_________________
Eugene, Or. (United States):
Russell and Marsha Taylor met at a party, fell in love, got married, had two children, grew a business and bought a big white house on a hill.
But then a funny thing happened on the way to living happily ever after: Russell became Rebecca.
Diagnosed with gender identity disorder, Rebecca Taylor last year flew to Thailand to see a doctor she regards as the best in the world for sexual reassignment surgeries. Taylor describes the day of the surgery, Feb. 12, 2004, as "my second birthday."
The difference between who she is now and who she was then, she says, "is the difference between being real and playing a role." In her view, gender identity disorder is no different than, say, having a cleft palate: "It's a medical condition that needs to be fixed."
The surgery culminated a two-year process in which Taylor presented herself in public as a woman, started therapist-approved hormone therapy and took the necessary steps to acquire a new driver's license identifying her as legally female.
In her former life, Taylor was an Oakridge kid who played clarinet in the school band and guard on the school football team. A self-described computer nerd, Taylor joined the family's successful electronics business and served a stint on the Oakridge City Council.
Today, Taylor lives and works in Eugene, where her business, Diamond Edge Technology, provides a six-figure income for her and her family.
She also finds herself at political odds with other transgendered residents in town because, as a woman, she says she opposes allowing people who are not legally defined as female from entering women's public showers and locker rooms.
But mostly, Taylor, 38, defines herself as a homebody who dotes on her partner and children - and acts surprised when others are surprised that her marriage and family are intact.
"We are a great couple - far better now than when I was pretending to be who I was not," she says of her spousal relationship. "We are soulmates. The idea of us not being together is ludicrous."
She and the former Marsha Jones met at a party in Oakridge, where both grew up, and married in 1992. Daughter Megan, whose facial features resemble Rebecca's, arrived in 1997, and 5-year-old Ryan was born the same year the family moved to Eugene.
Marsha Taylor, 34, does some accounting work for Rebecca's business but is mostly a stay-at-home mom. Marsha sees little mystery in how she managed to modify yet maintain their relationship.
"I love her," says Marsha, who is bisexual. "It doesn't matter to me what genitalia she has. It's her soul, her spirit, her kindness. Overriding all that is our relationship and her parenting skills."
Oct 15, 2005
